It is incredibly important to teach kids and teens about sex, STIs/STDs, and talk with them about how to make the best choices for themselves. In fact, these conversations between parents and teens are shown to reduce the rates of:
- Sexual activity
- Unprotected sex STIs
- Sexual violence
- Unintended pregnancies
- Reduce the amount of sexual partners and delay the introduction of sexual intercourse in a teen’s life
Additionally, abstinence in teens and delayed sexual activity can lead to
- Academically, emotionally, and socially, they are more mature and ahead of their sexually active peers
- Decreased usage of drugs, tobacco, and alcohol
- Happier marriages and decreased divorce rates
- Lower rates of depression, anxiety, and suicide
However, “the talk” can vary drastically between parents or schools, and sometimes information can become skewed or incomplete. While it can be difficult to know where to start on talking to your kids about the birds and the bees, here are some tips to ensure that some gaps in knowledge can be filled.
Make Information Goal Oriented
It is very easy to just breeze through all the information and to put forth a list of rules or suggestions without actually explaining why they are important. Teens need to know why something is important. So instead of ending the conversation with “sex before marriage is unsafe,” follow it up with information on STDs and STIs, unplanned pregnancy, and other risks associated with sex before marriage. Ask them questions about what they already know and what questions they have about these types of behaviors. Find out what their friends are doing by asking questions. Remain calm, non-judgemental, and open. Don’t be afraid and remember, it’s probably more uncomfortable for them than it is for you.
Give Them Accurate Information
It is important that you do your research before talking to your child about sex. There is a lot of misinformation revolving around reproductive health, and you are your kids’ first database. Give them accurate facts before they learn false information from someone else. There are plenty of amazing sources out there that provide fact-based articles about teen health. We recommend looking into Natural Womanhood or the sex education courses recommended by the My Catholic Doctor Foundation.
Be Developmentally Appropriate
There is no need to tell your five-year-old about all the dangers of unprotected sex. However, this does not mean you should avoid the topic altogether. Even though you may not teach your younger kids about everything, you can still introduce them to important information about their bodies, internet safety, and inappropriate pictures and videos. Teaching your kids to watch out for adults who may cross boundaries or want to touch them inappropriately is incredibly important in preventing your child from being taken advantage of later in life. Additionally, research says that teaching your kids the name of their genitalia (as opposed to giving it a nickname) prevents sexual abuse in both younger and older kids.
Teach Them About Healthy Dating Relationships
There is going to come a day when your teen wants to start dating, and it’s important that they know how they should be treated in a dating relationship and how they should be treating others. Here are some important points you may want to touch on when talking to your teen about dating:
- maintaining their existing friendships
- continuing with their studies
- knowing they deserve respect from their new partner
- giving and asking for consent
Above all else, one of the biggest benefits of talking to your kids about sex is giving them a safe space to talk and ask questions as they arise. You want to open the door to conversation with them, even about topics that could be a bit more uncomfortable. Let your teen know that you are on their side and you love them and want what’s best for them. Create a safe environment for your teen to ask questions, seek advice, or follow up with conversations later when problems arise. Although they might not know it, having a conversation about sex with your teen will benefit them for the rest of their life.
HELP Pregnancy Aid teaches women about reproductive health and educates them on the basics they need in order to stay safe. Additionally, HELP offers classes that teach important life skills like budgeting and eating healthy, and classes specifically for new moms that focus on topics like pelvic health and children’s dental care. HELP aims to equip a woman for success in all areas of life, not just within the realm of reproductive health.
Source:
https://www.acog.org/clinical/clinical-guidance/committee-opinion/articles/2016/11/comprehensive-sexuality-education
Benefits of Delaying Sexual Activity
